Working over the Holidays
Bank Holiday Weekend FUN
It’s sunny, warm and if it’s quiet “Let’s play golf today” my wife and fellow property manager, Shirley, suggests just as the phone goes at 7am.
“Hi, I’ve got no hot water” the voice on the end says apologetically. ‘It’s not his fault’ I’m thinking, as I rearrange golf for Sunday.
“I’ll get it fixed this morning” I say with utter confidence (you know you can do this when you have wonderful, willing, contractors).
Meanwhile 8.15am, the washing machine at number 22 has stopped mid-cycle and the tenant cannot open the door; all her washing is entombed in grey water!! (Fix that before lunch and golf is still a possibility??).
9.06am “The front door is too stiff for my young children to open” (this is serious, if there was a fire in this apartment, who knows?).
Must, must, must be fixed by noon.
OK, Golf is definitely off but the front door is fixed by noon, phew.
“How about a lazy BBQ lunch instead” I proffer. “Great idea!” says Shirley “Let’s get some juicy ribs and a mean steak”.
11.10am Uh oh, “I’ve got water pouring into the kitchen cupboards” he says “I think it’s coming from the flat above”.
OK, no golf, no BBQ, no Easter. Oh, come on, it’s only one day!
1.11pm Light the BBQ, peel the prawns, pepper the steak and open a beer.
Ring, ring, ring, ring. Turn the BBQ off. “Oh Hi, is that John” (I nearly said no, not true, I only thought it for a moment)! “My gate fob is broken and I cannot get into the development unless I’m lucky enough to follow another resident in, can you get me another today?”
Whoa, that’s not easy, but hey, we do have a spare in the office! Job done.
2.31pm Eating garlic prawns and sipping a Becks. Might do the Telegraph crossword sitting in the sun later.
3.40pm Crossword complete (all holiday clues, not really a challenge, do I want a challenge?) Can you believe it, 4.33pm A couple have locked themselves out of their bedroom!
Righto, ladder, tools and parachute (and I hate heights). 5.30pm Couple back in their bedroom and very happy! The lock had jammed somehow so had to chisel it out from the inside, easy, done it before but without two people standing at the top of a ladder watching my every move through a second storey open window!
5.45pm Electrical storm and serious rain, very serious… Glad I chose not to play golf!
6.00pm Everybody happy. Hot water OK. Washing Machine OK. Front door OK. Flooded kitchen temporarily OK but needs more work. Gate fob delivered. Bedroom re-available for “use” (happy smiley faces)!! Looking forward to golf tomorrow, forecast is brilliant. Feet up, finish my Becks.
8.00pm Ring, ring, ring, ring. “We have been flooded out with the torrential rain – the cellar is nearly full, the electrics are inches away from the water”
10.00pm Fire brigade sorted it no problem, thank you boys.
Early night – it’s golf tomorrow! Somehow I don’t think so!!
By John Green,
Property Manager Extrordinaire!